The Guide Book's Instructor
by QueenOfTheSpazes
Summary: Chad Dylan Cooper got a job he didn't want. And unfortunately, he can't quit. Lucky for him though, he's found just the instructor to teach him how to deal. Only problem: the instructor is a movie character.
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMOR: I don't own Sonny With A Chance. If I did though, I would hav been on the Kiss Cam with Robert Adamson instead of Demi Lovato. LOL.

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"I'm telling you Chad, this role is perfect for you!"

"I know Myron." I tell my agent for the umpteenth time, as he goes on about how awesome the role of Sylvester Nilch is for me. "That's why I told you about it."

"And it's a good thing you did Chad! Think of how this'll improve your image!"

"Yeah right whatever." I stop paying attention, as I turn into the parking lot of Condor Studios. "Listen Myron, get me this audition or else."

"Whatever it takes baby!" he responds. "Have I ever let you down?"

"Prairie Ball" I retort. "Prairie Ball" was a movie about the journey of a mid-western college basketball team in 1905 and their struggle to be champions.

"Chad it's not my fault some freshly-out-of-high-school-female-screenwriter, wanted the lead to be Zac Efron." I roll my eyes as I park my car. "Who knew someone still had the hots for him?"

"Anyone who saw the cover of _Time_ magazine's Sexiest Man of the Year that year." I answer trying to keep my cool. "I knew there was a reason I banned him from The Falls besides being able to say that I banned him from The Falls. Yeah that was awesome."

"And it was awesome Chad." Myron agrees trying to get in on my good side. "Now that role is as good as yours babe."

"It better be Myron."

"It will CDC, it will."

"Uh-huh." With that I end the conversation and get out of the car. As I approach the entrance to the studio, I see my assistant Georgina waiting for me. Her green eyes look a little testy and she is holding a heap of papers in her right arm, along with my afternoon latte in her left.

"You're late Mr. Cooper." She warns.

"I know George, I know." Quickly she hands me the latte and we walk to the elevator. "Is Mr. Condor here yet?" I sip my drink.

"You're lucky he's not." She says going through the stack of papers in her arms. "He's at Dakota's wedding." She takes out a pink piece of paper and goes over it.

"What? Another one?" I question. "She's thirty years old and it's like her tenth time getting married."

"Fifth. Her fifth time." Georgina corrects me.

"Yeah, whatever." I drink my latte. "Big difference." Georgina rolls her eyes.

"The meeting is pushed back until later and Steven Spielberg called about-"

"When 'later'?" I interrupt her.

"Mr. Condor didn't say." The elevator stops at the top floor and we get off.

"So he'll just drop in at anytime?" I slightly panic.

"Well his exact words were: Better yet Georgina, since his birthday is coming up, why don't I surprise him? He always enjoys it when I come anyway- the kiss up. Tell him it's my birthday gift from me to him. Best one he'll ever get!"

"Oh great." I mumble as we reach my office. Georgina stops short of entering, and puts the pile of papers down on her desk as I continue onward into the huge corner room.

Two of the walls are only windows, looking out over the crazy Hollywood town I love so much and the other two walls are painted yellow. One wall is covered completely with miscellaneous photos and diplomas from various occasions in my life. Like the day Mackenzie got his high school diploma and then my actual high school diploma.

The other wall is actually hidden under a huge red cork board. The cork board is full of various memos of meetings, auditions and appointments I have to make within the next two weeks. Thanks to the lovely Georgina- who came up with the idea- I have been perfectly organized for years. I go straight to this wall whenever I enter the office.

"George" I affectionately call for the attention of my assistant. I hear her ruffle around as gets her notepad and pen from her desk.

"Yes Mr. Cooper?" She asks as she comes into the office.

"Is there anyway we can move back the meeting for the 'Just Jump' pilot?" I study the memo on the cork board with the information of the meeting and fold my arms. Georgina thinks.

"I don't think so." She replies a little unsure. "You've already rescheduled it twice, and marketing really needs to know the premiere date. Don't forget it's on our summer line up." I sigh annoyed. I really didn't want to go to this meeting. "It shouldn't take to long Mr. Cooper." Georgina tries to comfort.

"You don't know Nico and Grady like I do." I reply, still staring at the memo.

"True." She admits "But I've had the pleasure of having a few conversations with them and I did grow up watching 'So Random!'." I roll my eyes and turn to face her.

"I keep forgetting you're a Chuckle City citizen." I sigh.

"You still haven't warmed up to it?" She asks sarcastically.

"Ha-ha." I tease. "See if they can come for the meeting now." I walk to behind my desk, and stare out the wall sized window, which is facing a building I've become too familiar with. "Hopefully, with any luck, I can get out of here before two." I turn to my desk and reach into one of the drawers, pulling out a pair of black binoculars. I turn back to the window and peer out at that same building with a new point of view. "Who am I kidding? Maybe two-thirty."

"Yes sir, Mr. Cooper." Georgina concurs as she begins to leave the room to fulfill my wish. "And Mr. Cooper?" I put down the binoculars and face my assistant. "You know she would kill you?"

"What she doesn't know won't hurt her George. You should know that by now." She rolls her eyes at my response and walks out of the office. I return to my daily one o'clock meeting.

LATER THAT AFTERNOON

"Are you really bringing this up again?!" I rub my temples as Nico brings up an old argument from our teenage years.

It's well past three o'clock and the meeting has gone no where. The only thing I remember is that Nico and Grady wanted the premiere to be on their birthday. I told them that that couldn't happen because there was going to be a special that night. Somehow it got into an argument on how I never get them anything for their birthday and from there how I never keep my promises to them and into how I never gave them the ride to the "Oh No You Didn't" Awards.

"We gave you all those gifts!" He reminds me for thousandth time.

"And all that food!" Grady coins in.

We were in my office rather than one of the smaller conference rooms because – crazy me- I had thought that this meeting wouldn't have taken more than at least a half hour. But no, it's going on almost an hour and a half now. I sit behind my desk rubbing my temples, as Nico stands in front of me both hands firmly on it. Grady is leaning against the glass wall to my left shaking his head in shame.

"I didn't exactly tell you guys that I'd give you a ride!" I defend my sixteen year old self.

"But you led us on." Grady says to me despicably. "So the least you can do-"

"Is nothing!" I cut him off.

"'Nothing'!" Nico argues.

"Yes. Nothing." I look up and argue back. "I've already paid you guys back for that car thing hundreds of times!"

"Like when?!" Grady questions. I stand up and start to count on my fingers, the times I've done things for them.

"For one when I gave you guys each a car for your twenty-fifth birthday." I point out. "Two, I didn't sue when you guys drained my pool and made it a giant sand box. Three, when I talked Howie, into producing your dumb 'Granico' sandwich - version eight. Especially, after it made me break out in hives. All over my face!"

"How were we supposed to know that you were allergic to pita?" Grady defends.

"Oh I don't know. Hmmm." I pretend to think. "By asking me!"

"Okay. Good point." He gives.

"Listen Chad." Nico announces. "You give us our birthday, or we'll take our bungee jumping reality show elsewhere." He folds his arm to signify the ultimatum.

"Yeah Chad." Grady walks over to Nico and imitates his movements. "Take it or leave it."

"Fine." They both smile and high five at my choice. "At 6 o'clock it is."

"Are you serious?!" Nico and Grady yell.

"I told you!" I respond. "We have the 'Camp Hip-Hop' Reunion that night! There's no way around it." They both huff.

"Fine" Grady finally accepts. "But for our birthday, you've got to get us something big!" He warns pointing a finger in my face. I squint and cock my head.

"Right." Pushing his finger away from my face, Georgina walks in.

"Mr. Cooper your wife is on the phone. Line one."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimor: don't own SWAC.

Sorry for the short chapter everyone!

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"Thanks George" I tell her as I pick up the phone and press 'one'. "I didn't forget to pick up Milkshake." I inform my wife for the thousandth time today.

"I didn't even know he was at my house."

"Tawni?" I remove the phone from my ear and stare at it before putting it back.

"Surprised?" She asks unnerved.

"You could say that." I reply rubbing my head I annoyance from how my afternoon had turned out.

"Well I knew you wouldn't answer if you knew it was me." She explains. "So I just said that I was our one and only and hey! It worked!" she starts to giggle. I sigh.

"What do you want?" I regretfully ask.

"A date with Conn." She says as if it's obvious.

"And why would I set you two up?" I respond, making it obvious that this date was not going to happen.

"Because then I'll tell your one and only that you made me get Milkshake and that you've been spying on-"

"Do you really think you can use blackmail on me?" I question her ability and she laughs.

"Chad, Chad, Chad." Tawni sighs.

"Tawni, Tawni, Tawni." I repeat with the same mannerism, but with more annoyance.

"Do you really want to risk it?" She gets to the point. I slowly think it over.

It's no secret that I don't like Milkshake, so she'll definitely believe Tawni in that area. The same with the spying thing. On a few occasions, she's walked in and seen me in the act, but I've come up with excuses to those times, still they weren't the best. If Tawni confirms it, it'll be silent-lecture city and I can't afford that at the moment.

"Fine." I cave. "Just promise not to ever call me again."

"I don't make promises I can't keep." At that the giggly blonde hangs up and leaves me with a headache. I hang up the phone and reach for my Excedrin, popping two into my mouth.

"Now about the premiere party for the show." I look up to see that Nico and Grady have not left my office. I roll my eyes and fall into my chair.

"George!" I call out. "I'm going to need more Excedrin!"


	3. Chapter 3

Discaimort: I don't own SWAC, I'm okay with it though.

Thanks for reading and please continue to review!

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"Go in." I command to the brown Welsh Terrier next to me, as we stand in front of our house with the front door open. "Go in Milkshake." I command again. "What do you want?" I ask as the dog just continues to pant, not making a move. "I let you walk without your leash, chase the squirrels up the tree, pee on my shoe and lead me in a circle five times in the past hour." I remind the dog unhappily. "Can't you just go inside so I can eat dinner?" I sadly beg.

"Milkshake!" I hear a high pitched voice yell. At the sound of his name, the dog runs into the house and disappears up the stairs.

_That he understands_ I complain to myself as I go into the two story suburban home and close the door behind me.

"Chad?" I hear someone call from the kitchen on the left. "That you?"

"Yup." I answer as I walk into the kitchen. Standing in front of the sink washing dishes, is a tall and lean brunette, with long hair that stops at her shoulders. I can't see her face, but by how her shoulders sag a little, I know it's been a long day for her.

"Thanks for walking Milkshake."She appreciates without turning to face me.

"Mmhm." I mumble. As I walk past her to the fridge, I draw my hand across her shoulder blade and see her straighten up in shock. She quickly giggles.

"I'm serious Chad." She decides not to acknowledge my caress and instead focuses on my comment. "I had to help Portlyn with her dancing. Her wedding is in a week you know."

"I believe you, I do." I take out a latte. "In no way do I think that you made me walk and pick up Milkshake from the vet, as punishment for not telling you about the 'Camp Hip-Hop' reunion." I play dumb. "Not at all." The beautiful brunette finishes her washing and faces me, hand on hip.

"Exactly" She smiles with all her teeth.

"Exactly." I repeat, smiling back.

"Good." She counters.

"Good." I counter back. "Fine."

"Fine." She retorts when her cell phone begins to ring. "What's wrong now?" She answers with drowsiness and begins to leave the kitchen. "Dinner will be ready in five." She whispers to me as Milkshake rounds the corner, entering the kitchen at full speed.

"NoNoNoNoNO!" I wave my hands at the dog, hoping he'll stop before he jumps on my lap. Something he loves to do for some reason. As usual, it doesn't' work and he topples me to the floor in delight. My wife laughs.

"No, I'm still here Port." She laughs into the phone. "Chad just got toppled by Milkshake again." She leaves the kitchen and walks away with a huge smile on her face. I shake my head in aggravation as the dog drools on me.

"Somebody!" I shout as Milkshake begins to lick my face. In the hallway a stampede can be heard on the stairs.

"Daddy!" The same high pitched voice that called for Milkshake earlier, shouts for me. "You're home!" With great difficulty, she pushes the dog off of me. I stand up and dust myself off. "Take me to the park please!" She grabs onto my waist.

"Allie, you're having dinner soon." I pick her up and she latches onto my neck.

"Please?" She begs with her big three year old crystal blue eyes.

"How about instead, I give you an icee?" I bribe my youngest. She thinks it over before agreeing. "That's my girl." I praise. After putting her down, I open the freezer and take out her favorite flavor. "Here you go Als, and don't let mommy find out." She eagerly accepts and walks out of the kitchen, with Milkshake in toe.

"Thank you daddy!" She yells back. I smile happily at a job well done, then move on to my next task. I leave the kitchen and go up the stairs, turning to the first room on the right. "Ethan" I say before entering the bedroom of my fourteen year old son.

"Yeah dad?" He's sitting at his computer desk in a swivel chair, next to the door. At my approach he swivels the chair to face me.

"Dinner will be ready in about five and it's your turn to set the table." He sighs.

"I know dad." He replies boringly. "But, tell me. Why is it that only mom, Carter and I set the table and not you and Allie?" I smirk.

"Because she's only three and I don't do the whole 'chore' thing." I put quotations around the word 'chore'.

"But you take Milkshake for his walks and bring the trash out each week." Ethan points out. "Those are chores." I give him a quizzical look and cross my arms.

"One, I've only walked Milkshake like twice, and no they're not." Ethan stifles a laugh.

"Uh, yeah they are. Ask mom."

"Your mom told me they weren't chores." I prove to him. "Just ways to help her out around the house." Ethan opens his desk drawer and takes out his dictionary.

"Chore: _a specific piece of work required to be done as a duty_." Ethan stops and turns a few pages. "Duty: _work that you are obliged to perform for moral reasons_." He looks up at me. "See dad? What you do are chores." Ethan smiles triumphantly at proving his point, just like his mother.

"Just go set the table." I crack before leaving the room and running down the stairs. "Munroe!"


End file.
